The last thing I do as I finish up getting ready for an appointment is to take one last look in the mirror. I might touch up my hair, add lip stick or just take a look. I silently say a few key words to myself, something like . . .
"I love this color on me, but my stomach sure shows in this. I really need to lose weight." "Looking good, but I like my eyes, without glasses. I hate wearing glasses." "I am excited for this opportunity, but what's with my hair? Yuk, I need a different style."
I would NEVER say these things to someone else. I wouldn't even think these things. I don't think of myself as a mean girl. OK, I am honest and if a friend were to ask my opinion, I tend to give her an honest answer. But I would never tell someone these things as they were walking out the door to begin an appointment. It's like putting a bullet in my self-esteem, so my confidence leaks out.
If I am not a mean girl, then why am I so mean to myself? I was always taught, if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all. But I treat myself that way. Why?
I hope I never said these things out loud when my girls were little. I hope they don't say the same things to themselves as they look in the mirror! These are certainly not the words I told them as they walked out the door each day. But did they hear what I said to myself?
It is time to stop! It is time to treat myself with respect. It is time to love myself, just the way I am. I need to learn to stop and don't say the BUT in the sentences! In the past when I struggled with my self-esteem I would repeat to myself, "God doesn't make junk. So, I am not junk! In God's eyes, I am beautiful." I think it is time to repeat those words when I look in the mirror. Just think how differently I would walk out the door.
It is time to stop! It is time to treat myself with respect. It is time to love myself, just the way I am. I need to learn to stop and don't say the BUT in the sentences! In the past when I struggled with my self-esteem I would repeat to myself, "God doesn't make junk. So, I am not junk! In God's eyes, I am beautiful." I think it is time to repeat those words when I look in the mirror. Just think how differently I would walk out the door. As I finish up getting ready, I take a deep breath and look in the mirror one last time. I smile and say out loud, "I love this color on me!"
"Looking good!" "I am excited for this opportunity." "I am awesome!"
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